Re: Guix paper

[Nikita Karetnikov <nikita@karetnikov.org>]

[-- Attachment #1: Type: text/plain, Size: 2385 bytes --]

> Although I’m tired of writing right now, I welcome comments.  :-)

Nitpicking:

1. I think that it would be better to move the Background heading to
   the next page.  Here is a possible solution: [1].

2. This document has a lot of hyphenation problems:

     - the word "based" on the second page;
     - the word "bash" on the second figure;
     - (uri "mirror://gnu/hello/hello-2.7.tar.gz") on the fifth page;
     - "origin-" on the sixth page;
     - "parametrize" on the sixth page;
     - "expression->derivation-in-linux-vm" on the seventh page;
     - "corresponding" on the seventh page;
     - "build-bootstrap-guile.-sh" on the eighth page;
     - "build-expression->derivation" on the eighth page;
     - "GNU Guix" on the eighth page.

   Possible solutions:

     - the "microtype" package [2];
     - use a single column instead of two;
     - the "hyphenation" command [3].

3. Use the "hypcap" option [4].

4. Typos:

     - "Two values are turned" (on the third page) should probably
       say: "Two values are returned."
     - "Allows for" (on the sixth page); "for" should be removed.
     - This one: "First, some GNU/Linux" (page 8) lacks the word
       "distributions."
     - "The" is probably missing here: "Ways to achieve this are
       known..."
     - Remove unnecessary spaces (page 10): "Store --- a system..."

5. Non-breaking space: [5].

   Examples:

     - "Figure 4" on the sixth and seventh pages;
     - "Section 3.4" on the ninth page.

6. Maybe it would be better not to use underline on the third figure
   [6].

7. I think that the word "hello" (on the third page) should be
   emphasized with the "texttt" command, not quotation marks.  I also
   think that the comma should go before the closing quotation mark.
   But this rule depends on the dialect.

[1] http://tex.stackexchange.com/questions/9576/how-to-avoid-heading-orphan
[2] http://stackoverflow.com/questions/1609837/latex-breaking-up-too-many-words
[3] https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/LaTeX/Text_Formatting#Hyphenation
[4] https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/LaTeX/Labels_and_Cross-referencing#Issues_with_links_to_tables_and_figures_handled_by_hyperref
[5] http://tex.stackexchange.com/questions/15547/when-should-i-use-non-breaking-space
[6] https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/LaTeX/FAQ#Forget_about_bold_and_underline

[-- Attachment #2: Type: application/pgp-signature, Size: 835 bytes --]