Re: Invitiation to VIP Workshops on Advanced Web Engineering for E-Business

[David Kastrup <dak@gnu.org>]

workshop@vreme.yubc.net writes:

> Dear Dr. Emacs,
> 
> I am happy to invite you to be a speaker at one or more of the
> four industrial workshops organized by IPSI Belgrade (Internet,
> Processing, Systems, and Interdisciplinaries), to be held as follows:
> 
> Madrid, Spain, March 21, 2004
> Frankfurt, Germany, May 9, 2004
> Stockholm, Sweden, September 25, 2004
> Milan, Italy, October 31, 2004
> 
> Details on the web
> http://www.internetconferences.net
> 
> A strong and innovative reviewing process providing a high quality
> feedback is a major asset of these workshops. See the web for
> details.

My dearest Professor Workshop,

I will be thrilled to attend your conference and workshop.  In
particular I'd like to hold a talk about the difference between free
beer and a free lunch (please consult
<URL:http://www.spam.com/sp/sp_fq.htm> for reference).

> All these workshops take place in the most exclusive hotels of the
> region, and are aimed at bringing together the most successful
> scientists of the field.  All workshops cover applicative research
> of interest for industry, but participants are invited both from
> industry and academia.

You'll find my name commonplace among both.

> The major goal of this forum is to

Shear a few vain sheep?

> establish a podium for a fruitful exchange of the newest scientific
> ideas, and that is why your participation is extremely important to
> all of us.

I bet.  With the focus being on "fruitful", I presume.

> As already indicated, only elite researchers and professionals are
> invited.

Sure thing, that's why Dr. Emacs has been high on your list.

> Conditions of this invitation are as follows:
> 
> 1. Duration of your slot is 20 minutes (15 minutes for your talk,
> and the rest for discussion).
> 
> 2. You are financially responsible:
> 
> (a) for the air ticket to arrive

No need for that.  Just download me from the nearest GNU mirror.

>  (b) for the hotel/breakfast cost (you can stay in any hotel that
> you select)

Do you have any hotels offering indemnification against mobs
assembling in the midst of night and shouting "vee eye vee eye"?  I
have had some bad experiences in that regard.

> (c) for the workshop fee (e200)

Well, talk is work.  The reward is the discussion.  200EUR for
5 minutes amount to 2400EUR per hour.  Not bad.

> (d) all other expenses that you may have during the trip.

> 3. The workshop fee is e200. It covers a professional reviewing
> process,

If it is as professional as your speaker selection, that will be
impressive.  It is, however, somewhat strange to list this as a
workshop benefit: usually the reviewing is over before the question
of attending arises.  Or are you reviewing the authenticity of the
Euro bills?  I am sure that you have lots of impressive onhand
experience in handling those.

> the workshop program, a book of abstracts, a CD with full papers,
> coffee/tea in the morning, a small working lunch in the early
> afternoon, and nothing else.

Such as rooms, chairs, toilets.

> 4. For the paper layout format, you are free to select any format
> that meets your needs and esthetical criteria.  Your paper will be
> reviewed, with the major intention to provide you with a feedback
> that can help improve the quality.
> 
> 5. Full papers are limited to maximum 1MBytes and minimum 4 pages.

Wise choice.  You'd not want to have the Email account in your
internet cafe bounce too many applications.  But you'd be surprised
how many pages 1MB of LaTeX source could give.

> 6. The scope of the workshops is relatively wide, 
> with Advanced Web Engineering as the common denominator.

I could have sworn that the common denominator was the fee.

>  The stress is on interaction of participants who address the issue
> from different angles, so all the following aspects are welcome:

[Everything]

Good luck.

-- 
David Kastrup, Kriemhildstr. 15, 44793 Bochum